Why would I prefer not to graduate…

The inevitable is getting closer. What is? Well, real life I’d say. Not that I’ve been living in a fantasy realm with unicorns galloping into the sunset and fountains pouring chocolate but… Hmm chocolate! Sorry, that’s another story. Back to the point: But studying has been sort of a security. There was always a new year ahead of me. There was nowhere else to go and admittedly, I’m too conscientious to get myself kicked out of school… So after every semester there came another. Until now.

Basically, ever since I can remember I’ve been studying. No, seriously. That’s been my whole life. From the age of six up to now… My dad told me once, that I won’t ever have so much time and money that I have now in my study years. At first I had to laugh. I mean, the depths of my purse where quite clearly visible and wow, managing uni, a part-time job, meeting friends, and tiding up your room from time to time was challenging enough already. Surely he must have been kidding. However, with hindsight I realised how right he was. Arranging things with working people or kids-raising people is damn difficult! They were lucky enough that I could always adjust my “full” timetable to theirs…And imagine when you yourself are actually working! Phew…

Student life is the best as they say. And often you realise only when it’s over. I can claim that I’m aware of it already. Maybe that’s why I dread the change that’s approaching. It takes a lot more responsibility and a quite different time management. Not that I would be the type to avoid responsibility but I just don’t feel ready to be a “proper adult” yet. Bye bye getting up at 11 a.m. during the week. Bye procrastination and staying up late. I don’t know what else I’ll have to say farewell to.

Surely I don’t want to go around moaning that graduating and getting a job is the end of the world. And undoubtedly, it’s going to bring many advantages, new opportunities and acquaintances. But right now it’s seems freaking scary to me. And to all of you feeling the same, I just want you to know, that you are not alone! Even if everybody around you looks like they’ve got it all figured out. Well, they don’t. Or if they truly have, then you can still look at me and comfort yourselves.

I’ve got the feeling that every day new questions emerge in my mind. Okay, what job do you actually want? What are you supposed to do right after graduating? Which offices do you have to visit? And later… what about your friends? Will they still have time to meet up and have fun? Will they stay in the same city or even country?

To conclude on a more positive note I’d like to say that we all have our fears and it’s completely okay for we are just human. As everything unknown I had to face, I’ll have to confront this new period of my life as well. From experience I know that it all comes gradually. It won’t be a giant wave that sweeps everything away and leaves only chaos. Step by step it’ll fall into place. And it’ll be fine, right? Right.

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